The child

so today the child says to me, I'm worried that you know how daddy is in the army?

-yes.

and he carries a gun?

-yes.

I'm worried that someone one will try to shoot him.


.......

from the mouth of a seven year old. yeah.

angry email

I got a snarky email from M, and i most say that i was ..... annoyed. It's hard being angry with your spouse when they're across the world. he hasn't been able to talk to me very much this week-he's been busy which i can understand. BUT it seems clear to me that obviously when i can answer your IM I do, if I don't answer I am probably not here.....


Ugh.

This deployment sucks, i can't even be frustrated with him without feeling bad for being frustrated with him....

boo

for some reason I thought the time time would fly by-you know there's still life to love. gotta get the kid off to school, go to work...etc. evryday is an eternity-i cannot imagine he's only been gone for three months.

i just never expected it to hurt so bad in random painful bursts....

This is the understatement of the FREAKING CENTURY!

Extended deployments stressing GIs, families
Problem especially acute as troops return to war zones for fourth, fifth time
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20230892/

Anniversary

At work yesterday, I got the flowers that Mike sent me. Then I started crying in the office. The flowers are fabulous, the card is beautiful and still makes me tear. Our first anniversary is this weekend and so far I am handling it ok. I do know that I would give a thousand beautiful flowers if I could spend it with M.

THE Call Redux

Crisis averted.

Good Lord, I love that man.

Army Wives

I LOVE this show. And I love reading the comments from the other women over on Standing By. It's something I really look forward to, I feel that most people who are not involved in army things sometimes just don't get it. These weekly sessions and just reading others' post is cathartic beyond belief - I swear when the show goes off I will miss my weekly dose.

It does always make me miss M. always. but in a productive way not in a pity party way.

THE Call

yesterday, I got this phone call at my house. at 11:45PM. for my husband. from a woman. ...

She asked for him by name and wouldn't leave a message. Her name is A, nothing more, nothing less and there's no message. then she hangs up. I will not pretend that I played it cool. My heart stopped, I mean it--literally stopped. then I started obsessing! who is this PERSON and why is she calling my house? I was losing it..

Then I started to regain rational thought-I trust M, I really do or else I couldn't, wouldn't be in this with him. I told him about it and told him I would give him the number. Am I more suspicious, more paranoid because he's not with me right now? maybe but i am trying to be adult about it. maybe it all comes down to me missing him like crazy, more than i could have imagined.

i'm over it (i think...). i'm not going to obsess any more. it was nothing I'm sure. done with my psycho melodrama.

......


but i still want to know how the CRAP is calling my house at FRIGGIN midnight trying to talk to my husband.....

John, I think you're grasping at straws here..

McCain raps Congress for bridge collapse
Claims diverting money to pet projects hurts infrastructure
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20123417/

Let's not keep taking a tregedy and try to meld it into freaking camp[aiogning ALWAYS. That crap gets on my nerves-there are too many issues to discuss in this election.

i don't like it

You know it's been two months since M technically left and really I was doing ok. Now, I'm started to flag a little bit. the prospect of 10 more months is freaking RIDICULOUS. I am trying to be positive, i have decided that I will focus on getting us into our house. That's what I want next, I need a goal to focus on--besides waiting for the phone to ring....

P.S.

She can't even spell hypocrisy right. You want me to take that seriously!!!? Boo.

CRAZY

I was reading another blog and found this one: http://feministmilitaryspouse.blogspot.com/. I am so annoyed that I can't even handle it. I realize it's juts a random person's blog but REALLY! Aren't we past this kind of thing? As feminists? as women? as people? I certainly hope I am. I, for one, embrace my feminism and my military spouse PROUDLY!

The Beginning

So my intern, EP, hooked me on this whole thing. This is my first post and my entrance into the blog world. I hope to be able to communicate things, question everything and learn from this. Who knows, as EP say: "these loans ain't going to pay themselves off" so maybe I can click my way to a fortune!